


goodbye

by plausibly



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Dean - Freeform, DeanCas - Freeform, Destiel - Freeform, Futuristic, Human Dean, M/M, Random - Freeform, cas, castiel - Freeform, cheesy?, dean is leaving, enjoy?, everyones human, human cas, i blame the night, i was emotional, idk what i wrote, it was late, kinda short?, lots of au, non Canon, sappy?, so much AU, sorry - Freeform, totally just bad angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-28
Updated: 2015-10-28
Packaged: 2018-04-28 16:48:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5097995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plausibly/pseuds/plausibly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean had made his decision long before Castiel tried to contradict it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> A few things I'd like to say before you begin:
> 
> \- This is based off of a single scene i saw on my TV  
> \- Think it was the show Gotham  
> \- If it was THIS ISNT BASED OFF OF IT, just inspired :)  
> \- This is a futuristic fic, placed some time in the future of some country  
> \- This is completely not canon, so much AU it hurts  
> \- There's a couple plot holes that aren't filled because this is really short so fill them in yourself  
> \- If this was in a story it would be somewhere in the middle soooo  
> \- I don't have that much commitment though so this is it  
> \- I wrote this late at night, so if it's bad I'm sorry.  
> \- Probably sappy, I'm emotional at night
> 
> That should be all enjoy!  
> -autumn

Castiel was leaning by one of the wooden planks when Dean walked up. His eyes were drooping like he’d just woken up, but he was posed like he was ready to kill anything that got near him. Dean knew that stance, he knew the tension and the fear rippling through him when he stood like that. What Dean didn’t know was why he was standing like that here, in the middle of the night, on the roof. There was a moment of silence where Dean opened his mouth, ready to make some excuse about coming up here late into the night with a backpack and enough clothes on to last him days, but he just closed it up again.

“Dean?” Castiel said softly, his head shaking a little. Dean knew he was so tired, and something had to have woken him up. Dean hadn’t wanted to do this with him here.

Dean looked away, off the edge of the roof and towards the city. “Yeah?” He whispered, tugging the backpack close to him, feeling like it told all his secrets. Maybe it did, or maybe Castiel had really good inferencing skills.

“Are you-” Castiel paused, closing his eyes and opening them again. “Are you leaving?”

Dean shuffled his feet and played with the zipper on his jacket. “Yes - I mean no, not like this.” He looked back up at Castiel, his stance less dangerous and more worried and exhausted. Dean knew that one too, he had seen it when Castiel talked about his family. Dean sucked in a short breath, not willing to be the person that caused that.

“Why?” Castiel whispered, stepping away from the plank and stopping ten or so feet from Dean. Only when his footsteps stopped and he looked back up did Dean speak again.

“I - uh, I needed to fix things.”

“What kinds of things?” Castiel interrupted, something he had stopped doing a couple months after they met.

The sudden comment took Dean by surprise, and he met Castiel’s eyes just to see them filled with a losing hope. Dean looked away. “Something needed to be done - what happened, I couldn’t just let it go, Cas.”

Castiel shook his head furiously, his stance changing once more. He was upset, and protective. Protective of what? Dean? That didn’t seem right, but then again nothing about this conversation did. “Dean-” He whispered. “You can’t - I don’t want you to -”

“I’m doing this for you.” Dean bit out, the conversation taking a dangerous reroute.

“You’re leaving in the middle of the night without a trace to go kill, for me?” Castiel said harshly, his hands shaking by his sides. Dean saw him shove them in his pockets. “I’m lucky I woke up, were you even going to tell me?”

Dean looked off towards the city, he needed to go, but with Castiel here filled with so much worry and apprehension, Dean had to finish this conversation. “I was going to leave a note.” He whispered.

Castiel sighed. “Typical.” He said. “Dean, you can’t do this.”

“Why not, Cas?” Dean’s head snapped back to Castiel, his breathing picking up pace, his nerves on edge. He had his reasons for this, and as much as he didn’t want to leave Castiel, he had too.

“You can’t kill.”

“You have.” Dean said without thinking, and he began to regret it when Castiel’s face broke, and his stance fell again. “Shit, Cas,” he said. “I’m sorry - I didn’t -”

“I know.” Castiel said, meeting Dean’s eyes again, trying to show that he was okay. “You shouldn't though, you don’t need to avenge me.”

“Who else will?”

“Dean,” Castiel stepped forward, his presence more worried and less dangerous. This was new to Dean, Castiel was also dangerous around him, a bit sad sometimes, but never worried. Never about Dean. “No one hurt me. You have nothing to avenge.”  
“Everyone hurt you, Cas. I hurt you.” Dean whispered, head hanging and hands loose by his sides.

“That was a long time ago.” Castiel said, his words a promise hanging in the air that Dean did not accept. “If you go, I’ll be alone again.”

“I’ll be back.” Dean said sternly, knowing he had to leave, but also knowing that he’d come back. He’d always come back.

Castiel shook his head. “I've heard that before.” He said softly, his words a warning that Dean didn't want to listen to. That he couldn't listen to.

“Cas,” Dean said, “I’ve got to go. I can’t miss this opportunity. Knowing that I could have done something, and I hadn’t. That’ll kill me.” The emphasis Dean put on the word kill wasn’t planned, but he saw Castiel visibly flinch. Dean would have apologized, but he had a feeling Castiel didn’t want attention drawn to it.

“Why do you feel like you need to do this for me?” Castiel shuffled his feet, his face too confused for what Dean saw as something so simple.

Dean stopped looking around Castiel’s face, he had been looking everywhere but his eyes. Trying to avoid the emotion he knew was pouring out of them. He stopped avoiding and spoke. “Why wouldn’t I? You’ve done so much for me Cas, and I’ve done nothing for you.”

“You’ve done everything for me.”

“I’ve gotta go, Angel.” Dean hadn’t called Castiel that since when they first met and Castiel had told him he was named after an angel. It was such an endearing term, that it would have been out of place to use for someone like Castiel, someone who was just his friend. Here though, under the stars on the roof having this type of conversation, Dean didn’t question saying it. Castiel didn’t say anything about him saying it either.

“Dean-”

“If I don’t go tonight, I’ll go tomorrow. I don’t want to leave you, Cas. ‘Course I don’t want to. I just - I feel like this is something I need to do.” Dean saw Castiel open his mouth, he saw the words he wanted to speak. But Dean didn’t want to hear them, and he knew Castiel well enough to know what they were, and how he would say them, and the order they’d be in. “Don’t.” Dean whispered. “Don’t tell me that I don’t need to redeem myself, that it’s all forgotten. Because if it was forgotten I wouldn’t have ever come out here, Cas. Don’t you see? I need to do this not just for you, but for -” Dean paused, realizing what he was about to say. He hadn’t meant to go that far, he hadn’t meant to tell Castiel that much.

“For yourself.” Castiel finished his sentence for him, they seemed to be doing a lot of that lately, knowing each other so well they never needed to speak full thoughts. For them, bits and pieces were enough. “I don’t want you to go, but if you need -”

“I need to.” There they went again, finishing each other’s sentences way too often. So often that Dean knew if they knew anybody else, they’d notice.

Castiel looked so defeated, something Dean had never wanted to see. “Well, I guess this is goodbye, then.” He whispered quietly, his eyes searching Dean’s for some sign that he wasn’t going to leave. Dean knew he wouldn’t find anything.

There was so much Dean wanted to say - about how he’d come back, about how this wasn’t goodbye, about how Castiel wouldn’t actually be alone - not now, not ever. Dean didn’t say any of that though, he just watched the sun begin to rise behind Castiel’s head, knowing that he had to go now, go soon, but never making a move to leave.

It was Castiel that stepped forward and wrapped Dean in a hug. It was something so simple, but so full of worry and concern that it drowned Dean. In all the years he had known Castiel, he had never seen this much emotion, felt this emotion. Castiel was strong against Dean, despite his wavering will. Castiel had always been the stronger part of Dean.

It was minutes later when Dean realized he was still holding Castiel and neither of them were letting go. It was also then that he realized that Castiel was whispering into his shoulder, one word, his name, over and over. Dean closed his eyes and squeezed, he needed to go, but he didn’t want to leave this safety he had with Castiel.  
In the end it was Dean who pulled away, and Castiel who blinked slowly up at him, his eyes still fighting a hopeless battle begging Dean not to go. Dean leaned down, pressed a single gentle kiss to Castiel’s forehead, something else he had never done. He didn’t have time to gauge Castiel’s reaction before he was whispering one last goodbye and heading to the edge of the roof.

Dean knew Castiel watched him crawl all the way down to the ground.


End file.
